Today we look at Lily Love and Mia Malkova in “Testing My Limits.” It tells the story of an assistant to the celebrities struggling with setting up all of her clients’ playdates. Admins need dick, too.
Ugh. I hate when people say stuff like this. Lily’s line is probably the first sentence she writes on a resume. I get it. We should always display professionalism in our careers. And for a lot of people without hobbies, interests, or a passion, their jobs have a more prominent place in their lives. But Christ, I would like to think there are other things in Lily’s life truly worth having pride over.
Wait, wait. Lily’s pride is in work as an assistant? Get the fuck outta here. And what are these limits being tested by A-list celebrities (celebrities like The Miz, of course)? Are they trying to see how long she can ignore their sexual advances?
I thought Lily was saying “not once have I given it.” So when she’s rubbing down that skirt I’m thinking to myself, wait, celebrities are asking for anal? Then I remember this is Vixen.com, not Tushy.com. I’m getting my high-brow porn sites confused.
So Lily mentions that current client, Luke Reynolds, is pushing her limits more than usual. The implication is that either all her clients are offering dick, or the job creates a lonely life where she would like some dick but can’t find the time for it.
It’s like young White House interns. If you want to make significant professional connections and have your future all but taken care of, working for Donald Trump isn’t a bad gig. But telling people you work for Trump also means no one will want to fuck you.
Lily is stuck in a rut of either turning down dick every day or taking up many of her clients’ responsibilities so they can bone while she is rubbing one out before going to bed. Congrats Vixen.com. I’m actually intrigued to see where this goes.
That’s cold. So it looks like Lily isn’t getting some due to the demands of the job, but one of the requirements of the position is ensuring her clients can get some. Who’s looking out for Lily and her pussy?
It looks like Mia Malkova and that ass get the call. Why does every character have an upscale living? So far we’ve been led to believe that Mia’s groupie salary affords an apartment near midtown, while Lily can pay $4K a month in rent being an admin. Am I wrong about all of this?
Was Luke seriously waiting for Mia on this unnecessarily large sectional?
I would’ve given this scene 1000 points if Lily gave Mia a forearm to the jaw before proclaiming her affection for Luke.
This is an anti-climatic way to reveal that Lily decided to start fucking clients. Which, if I may add, is rarely a good idea and the opposite of being professional. I’m highly concerned about Lily’s pride. Can’t help but feel like Lily appearing in a blonde wig would’ve made this more fun. But when you can threesome with Mia, threesome.
Mia and Lily may be smiling at each other (Lily creepily doing so). But you know they secretly hate the other person’s presence right now.
Hahahaha!!! I don’t know why, but this shot of Luke taking a sip of his drink just cracks me the fuck up. At any moment, I’m expecting him to put his glass down and say, “I think you two should fight.”
And we’re officially off. Lily understands this is now going to become the new thing, right? Any time Luke asks for a girl, he will also expect Lily to tag team. And I bet it still won’t lead to a generous Christmas bonus.
In case you forgot you were watching a threesome and not a lesbian scene, Lily and Mia signal to Luke that it is okay for him to join them. But only after he finishes the drink.
Wait, Luke is still seated? This motherfucker is seriously about to finish that drink first. Respect. Also, Mia’s ass is sticking out like a sore thumb at this moment. Typically, porn threesomes shoot with similarly built pornstars. I’m not saying Lily doesn’t have an ass, but she sure as hell doesn’t have THAT ass.
He’s. Still. Drinking. Watching Lily and Mia fuck is a boss move. But if he was looking to get some action, he better hurry up before Lily and Mia decide his services are no longer needed. You know what they say about the Finger Lakes. If a woman has a favorite finger, then she doesn’t need a man.
That would totally be me in this situation. Grinning from ear-to-ear on the couch, assessing how beautiful of life I must have to parlay my status into a threesome with Lily Love and Mia Malkova. It’s like the boyhood dream come true for Luke. This is his WrestleMania XII.
What?! Lily and Mia have been waiting for you, dipshit! They aren’t here to fuck each other. Stop babysitting that drink and stand up already. I don’t understand that line or how it got into the final script and edit.
Ouch. I’m sure Luke is some maestro that understands the art of teasing Lily or some bullshit, but that’s gotta hurt the ego a bit, no? Lily had the guts to put herself in a vulnerable position by forcing into an arrangement meant for Luke and Mia. And Luke immediately goes for the girl he requested, not the assistant who has done everything he has asked for.
I’m probably building conflict in places where there isn’t one, but that bottle is still half full, and Lily could turn this sex scene into a crime scene real quick.
Five years from now, when Lily has a child and is managing Luke’s career (not just assisting it), Luke is going to tell her that she was the only person on his mind while Mia was sucking his dick.
This CUMSHOT! means the scene is done and Luke may want to spend his life with Lily, or something. We only cum on the stomach of someone we care about. That’s the rule. I dunno what Vixen.com was trying to say about their future. Pending there is anything to be said at all.
As always we don’t cover the sex unless something interesting happens. But in case you want to watch the scene, here’s what you missed:
- A double-barrel blowjob.
- Cowgirl with Lily. Glad she got dick first.
- Cowgirl with Mia.
- Reverse cowgirl with Lily.
- Reverse cowgirl with Mia.
- Doggystyle with Mia while she’s on top of Lily.
- Missionary with Lily while she holds Mia’s hand. Cute.