How did Don Jon masturbate to porn 11 times in a day?

I love the film Don Jon. About 80% of its message on porn and masturbation addiction interfering with life rings uncomfortably true. There is one thing I don’t understand, though: how did Jon “Don Jon” Martello masturbate to completion 11 times in a day?

If you have never seen the film, here’s as brief of a synopsis as I can offer without spoilers. Jon is a porn addict and bartender. He sleeps with many of the girls he comes across at his workplace but insists that masturbating to porn is more satisfying. He starts a relationship with a character who looks exactly like Scarlett Johansson, but his inability to stop watching porn causes some struggles.

A shame, really. That’s a bad reason to lose out on sexual intimacy with someone who looks exactly like Scarlett Johansson. Admittedly, the film goes deeper than the direction I’m about to take. There are larger discussions on porn being one-sided, overcoming addiction, and sexual authenticity in porn. But I stopped the synopsis at a point where I struggle to understand a couple of things.

One, how did Jon not know that an internet browser saves the browsing history? That’s like lesson #1 to browsing porn without getting caught.

Two, how in the world did Jon masturbate 11 times in the aftermath?

Having a relationship end is depressing, especially if you’ve been dumped or if it was avoidable. Masturbation, especially when done to excess, can be used to try to medicate emotions or provide a brief escape from reality. I’ve been that dude, masturbating multiple times in a day in a poor attempt at reaching for gratification in the chicken-egg relationship porn addiction had with my sex life. So I get it.

There’s no universal barometer on how many times is too many when it comes to masturbating. Men are told to focus less on the frequency and more on how masturbating affects our daily living. Masturbating every day is technically fine until we’re losing sleep, skipping class in college, or having less sex with a dedicated partner.

But we’re talking about daily or weekly masturbation. This dude came 11 SUCCESSIVE TIMES!

The most I’ve masturbated to completion in one day is four times. And it wasn’t even successive because I would never have a block of time for that or a way to create one. Want to know why I stopped at four? Not because I got the escape I needed or ran out of porn to masturbate to. I stopped because my dick hurt. I got tired.

Frequent masturbation can cause skin irritation and soreness. No different than doing too many bicep curls. Beating off is a workout, and I remember my dick being in so much pain the next day. So how Jon’s dick was conditioned enough to withstand 11 self-poundings is beyond my understanding.

Wouldn’t he have a headache? Wouldn’t he run out of jizz after the fifth ejaculation? Cum turns watery after the third time.

I feel like this is where my porn and masturbation addiction was headed, having this unnecessary need to watch porn on a daily basis, not realizing I’m just watching the same things repeatedly. Hell, that is where my life eventually went. But thank goodness porn bored me enough to stop. And thank goodness I didn’t masturbate 11 times and ruin the next 48 hours of my life.

Note: This was originally posted on my other blog Pornucate.

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