AJ Applegate teaches Eva Lovia how to be a stripper and eat ass

Welcome to Porn Logic! We’re watching “The Wannabe Stripper” featuring Eva Lovia and AJ Applegate from Girlsway.

Eva wants to learn how to be stripper to make ends meet, even though starting an OnlyFans or webcam would be easier. AJ teaches her some rather basic moves, and Eva is like, “never mind that shit, show me how to lap dance.” Then for reasons, the two have seggs.

Matter of fact, let Quillbot summarize the scene for you:

Eva Lovia’s bills are racking up and she decides stripping is the best option. Eva hires personal dancer and trainer AJ Applegate to teach her how to strip. The lesbian lovers take off their clothes and passionately pleasurate each other in front of a mirror.

Pleasureate? More like pleasure-ate.

Eva Lovia tells AJ Applegate she doesn't look like a stripper.

We kick things off with some cringe as Eva comments that AJ doesn’t look like a stripper. I mean, she does, but only because a stripper could be virtually anyone. Even Constance Wu!

Things quickly get awkward as AJ asks what Eva means. Eva clarifies, saying she imagines a stripper wearing fishnets with glitter everywhere and “glow in the dark” whatevs.

That’s stripper-ist. Is that what a stripper is supposed to look like?

First off, there’s no point in glow in the dark anything because a strip club is never pitch black. Second, not every stripper wears fishnets. Every stripper and customer DOES mysteriously have glitter on them, so I’ll give her that.

AJ tries to lighten up the mood by saying she would only do those things for tips. I’m sorry, is glitter, fishnets, and glow in the dark underwear like microtransactions in a video game?

Eva doesn’t laugh. She either doesn’t get AJ’s humor or genuinely expected a stereotypical looking stripper for a teacher. At this point, these two need to hit the restart button and start over.

AJ Applegate does a sexy walk around a stripper pole.

AJ begins the lesson and asks if Eva wants to start with the basics. Eva’s like “you’re the teacher, so you tell me.”

AJ starts by showing Eva how to do a sexy walk around the pole, and I naturally wonder what constitutes a sexy walk? Here’s how Cosmopolitan defines it:

It’s a slightly tamer, SFW version of the Victoria’s Secret model strut. Your head is up, shoulders are back, and you lead with your boobs. Your arms swing loosely back and forth while your hips swivel from side-to-side. Your weight is more in your heels.

OK. Here is how TV Tropes defines it:

When a woman walks with hips wriggling back and forth.

Nailed it! So Eva should twist and turn her hips while she walks. Create some butt jiggle. Dudes love a little butt jiggle.

Eva stares blankly at AJ.

I’m personally enjoying AJ’s demonstration, but Eva is caught staring off into nothingness. She’s either tired, bored to tears, or madly in love lust. It’s porn, so there are ways for all options to be on the table.

AJ bends over, showing her big butt.

AJ bends over and “shakes [her] booty a little bit” because Girlsway needs to remind us that this is porn and not an actual pole dancing tutorial.

Eva stares at AJ"s big butt.

We’re all looking at AJ Applegate’s big butt. Especially Eva, who is looking at AJ the way I look at cake. Goodness, I need to unpack the innuendo in that sentence because my mind is too hyper-active not to.

According to Urban Dictionary, cake is slang for ass or butt, preferably one that is “juicy, plump, [and] voluptuous.” I do like big butts, can’t lie. I also like actual cake because I have a sweet tooth.

In my unhealthier days, I would buy a slice of red velvet cake from Publix as a snack. Snack is slang for “someone who looks good at the moment.”

This is all to say, AJ’s ass is looking like a snack, and Eva is ‘bout ready to eat her cake.

AJ twerks on a stripper pole.

Where were we before I got sidetracked? Oh yea, twerking! AJ starts twerking for Eva. I was going to comment that twerking is a basic stripper move, but I remembered AJ opted to start with the basics. So, carry on.

AJ stretches on the stripper pole as Eva watches.

AJ shows how to do some “simple stretches” on the pole as Eva stares at her core muscles. Either that or AJ’s cameltoe is showing. It’s here I realize this scene needs music the way John Wick needs guns.

I also realize AJ clearly didn’t prepare a lesson. You know, the lesson Eva has paid good money for despite, lemme me check my notes—her bills racking up. I know teaching isn’t easy, but walking into class with a plan has to be a basic requirement, no?

AJ bites her lip as she watches Eva dance.

Eva decides she is ready to try these basic moves for herself. You can only learn so much by holding a clipboard. Eva shakes her butt in front of AJ. AJ bites her lip a bit. Just f*** already.

Eva shakes her ass on AJ.

AJ decides to help Eva by getting behind her and pulling Eva’s butt into her crotch. That can’t be necessary.

Eva doesn’t seem to have any issues with form. Plus, AJ is teaching her how to look sexy around a pole, not how to do bent-over rows. And even if she were teaching bent-over rows, this still wouldn’t be necessary.

And quickly (for safety purposes), do the following for bent-over rows: allow some bend in your knees, maintain an arch in the spine, and avoid jerking the weight.

AJ all but tells Eva that her ass looks amazeballs. Eva takes note and wriggles her ass more. There’s something about women intentionally trying to be sexy and flirty that comes across more adorable than sexy and flirty.

The Wannabe Stripper - AJ Applegate and Eva Lovia

AJ watches Eva twirl around the pole for a bit. She comments that Eva is getting the hang of it before letting out a light laugh and flipping her hair. That’s code for, bitch, please try something, anything different. Hehe. I’m flirting.

It’s here I notice AJ has CLEARLY been hitting the gym. Her upper body looks strong and fit. Good for her, she looks amazing.

AJ helps Eva stretch on the stripper pole.

Eva takes a hint and starts practicing those “simple stretches.” Considering how awkward things were a few minutes ago, I’d say the communication between these two is improving.

Everything about Eva’s stance and how she’s staring into AJ’s eyes suggests Eva is about to take her shot. I can feel it. I’ll put the over/under at 20 seconds. This prompts AJ to get a bit handsy again and create an open lane for the two to kiss.

Eva Lovia and AJ Applegate kiss

And boom goes the dynamite. I’m clocking this at 21 seconds. That’s a bad beat. Feel free to pick up your money at the cashier on the way out.

The two kiss for a while, but AJ is like, “enough with this. Want me to give you a lap dance?” AJ doesn’t waste time, I like that. No need to crawl when you can run.

This feels like an extra service, which—good on AJ for upselling. It’s also possible this is AJ not having an actual lesson plan and just doing whatever allows her to sex Eva.

According to various threads on The Ultimate Strip Club List, the average lap dance is anywhere between $10 and $30. That doesn’t include a tip. I wonder if prices have risen with inflation.

Eva and AJ kiss and grind on a leather sofa.

Eva leads AJ to a noisy, leather loveseat. I’m pretty sure AJ should be leading Eva since AJ is doing the lap dance. That’s just good customer service. Everyone knows that.

I remember getting a lap dance on that same leather loveseat at the Pink Pony off Corporate Blvd. That was the first strip club I had ever visited. I was overwhelmed by the abundance of vagina and breasts.

One thing I don’t remember is touching or kissing the dancers. That’s a clear no-no! Save that for the VIP room.

Eva grabs AJ's big butt.

Eva starts sliding her hands across AJ’s butt. Eva says AJ’s butt is “perfect,” once again proving that women can say things that men would sound creepy saying. This is also an accurate observation by Eva. AJ Applegate does have a perfect butt.

AJ strips and goes topless for Eva.

After some more touching, AJ drops down and says she sometimes like to get on her knees for … we’re never told. We have no idea what she gets on her knees for, at least not within this context. Eva’s like, “Oh yea? … Go on!”

AJ is doing a lot of nothing, and Eva asks if AJ could teach her more about the stripping side of business. Come again? AJ is on her knees, in between your thighs, going to do something at any moment, and you think NOW is the best time to have this conversation?

But I stand corrected because Eva is referring to how to take their clothes off. I heard her words in reverse: I thought she was asking about the business side of stripping.

Strips clubs are ultimately about stripping, so Eva is right for asking. She also makes it clear she wants to learn for educational purposes. Eva Lovia is too damn cute and genuine in this scene and needs to be protected at all costs.

Eva licks AJ's nipples.

AJ takes off her top slowly. That’s how girls take off their tops in titty drop videos, and those things get like millions of hits. Slow clothing removal is sexy.

AJ gets back on top of Eva, and Eva proceeds to lick her nipples. AJ reminds Eva she’s definitely not supposed to do that. Unless you’re in a VIP room.

That is true. Along with touching and kissing, don’t lick a stripper’s nipples. Or any body part, for that matter. But hun, we’re way beyond things we’re definitely not supposed to do. Besides, nipple-licking is for educational purposes.

This goes on for a bit before AJ suggests Eva can remove her clothing, too. Why am I the only one shirtless right now? I appreciate how AJ only speaks in code.

Eva Lovia and AJ Applegate scissoring

We get a shirt removal. Then some yoga pants exit stage right. Then more yoga pants disappear. Before we know it, both girls are butt-ass naked on the loveseat and grinding on each other. That escalated fast.

Then we get some light scissoring as AJ teaches Eva a valuable lesson about lap dances. Scratch that. Let’s call this is a lesson in VIP rooms, because this is clearly no longer a lap dance.

Rather than seeing this for what this is (aka Eva has essentially paid AJ for sex), let’s look at this for what AJ is trying to teach Eva. Having a customer pay a stripper hundreds of dollars, only for the customer to please the stripper and not the other way around is one hell of a hustle and worthy of applause.

Many years ago, I friend of mine told me he paid nearly $400 for a VIP room and ate out the stripper. Weird because he would never pay $15 to eat wings at a strip club but had no problem paying $400 to eat a random girl’s crotch.

AJ Applegate and Eva Lovia pussy licking in lesbian sex

Now Eva and AJ are just having sex and not giving two f***s about the do’s and don’ts of stripping. I’ll grab a cup of water and come back later if anything interesting happens.

AJ Applegate and Eva Lovia ass licking

Well, it looks like AJ is going to get her cake and eat it, too. AJ takes a snack break to pleasure-ate Eva’s ass. Is ass-eating interesting? “Maybe?” Okay, well, here you go.

AJ is not only a pole dancing teacher but an ass-eating professional and possible connoisseur. Eva rolled her eyes back so hard The Undertaker felt it.

I appreciate that rimming isn’t as taboo as it used to be. Not only is it the pièce de résistance of lesbian porn, but we all know someone who has done it. Either that or you’re the someone. I’m the someone.

According to Bobby Box and his article “How Eating Ass Went Mainstream,” a survey done by Future Method found that 42% of Americans have received analingus, while 41.6% have given analingus. Also millennials lead Gen X and Z in types of anal play tried. Congrats?

Eva Lovia orgasm from lesbian sex

The sound of Eva Lovia moaning from an orgasm means we’re done here. While you leave a tip on the table, let’s see how insane this video was.

“The Wannabe Stripper” isn’t insane. I’m at peace with it. I know absolutely zero about lesbian relationships, but being taught how to be a stripper seems like a reasonable scenario for sex to happen. The only crazy thing is that no music was involved in the teaching of this class. You can find “The Wannabe Stripper” on Girlsway and purchase a membership to download the entire scene. Have a good night, and drive home safely.

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